Hi, I'm Nice, Notvery Nice

Despite my lofty ambition to be kinder this year, I have to confess that I'm struggling quite a bit, especially the whole "be nice to people whom I don't share the same values or beliefs with" resolution. Of course I'm not talking about random strangers or criminals we read about in the news, but humans I actually have to physically interact with on a regular basis, often involuntarily.

It really boils down to how I judge people - I set some pretty high standards and expectations on being professionally and socially appropriate which I apply universally, and when I feel that a person compromises those standards, they unwittingly get downgraded in the "Bmuse chart of human integrity". Not that it would matter to them, since they wouldn't have a clue. I rarely show my disdain openly, and usually take pains to be ultra civil to these individuals. Only cause you know, that's part of the standards I set for myself.

Same applies to people who are not consistent in their behaviour or come across as lacking in candour in their dealings with others. Call it survival instincts or what you may, but people who come across as having an agenda when they are being nice or complimentary, just make my skin crawl. I make sure to stay a mile away and regard everything they say or do with a huge dose of skepticism.

Ultimately, I am sorry (but not really) that I just don't have the capacity to expand any generosity beyond what I deem to be acceptable, nothing more, nothing less. *shrugs* it may very well be a broken resolution, but so be it then.

I acknowledge that I am not a very nice person after all, but it's not the end of the world. Surely there are worse things than being completely civil but with a touch of frost. :p